For centuries, mothers have been handling the show. In the words of Beyonce, “who run the world?”
The things mothers do at home and outside the house, to maintain a sane, safe space for their kids and families have not deserved the attention, appreciation and respect that’s due. Often times these responsibilities are not even considered “real work” - a sentiment within many families and often our culture as a whole. This isn’t an Asian thing by any means - it’s a global epidemic. In fact, across the world, American women are now finally putting their foot down and declaring 2020 be The Year of The Mother. But The United States has jumped on the pro-motherhood bandwagon for awhile now - 2019 even saw some presidential candidates talk motherhood on the campaign trail. Americans are trying to recruit everyone onto this train - presidential candidates, employers, communities and even their partners - to take action to help mothers go from “surviving motherhood to thriving motherhood”. After all, it takes a village….
The official date has been set for a synchronized social launch to be on Monday, January 20, 2020. - the official day to mark 2020 The Year of The Mother.
Of course, there’s no one that can deny that career and motherhood come together as one of the greatest balancing acts of our time. And there will be no perfect balance, ever. It will be hard. And you will often be filled with emotion, confusion and exhaustion. Remember, there is no way to have it all but it is possible to navigate this terrain a little better, and we are here to do our part and help.
Here are our 5 commandments for you to work with immediately:
- Ditch The Guilt - You’ll never be able to do 100% of things at 100% quality 100% of the time. It’s impossible, so there is no aim in even trying for perfection. You can just focus on what your best is - not the best according to your friends, or society - but your personal best. Your best is one that’s based on your specific priorities for that day or month and things may fluctuate. So focus on your priorities for the moment and work towards that.
- Find Quality Child Care - You have other things to focus on, so worrying about how your kids will be in the hands of someone else is certainly not an added stress you can afford. So whether looking for reliable relatives, nannies, or daycare centers, make a list based on criteria that you value and do your research into the quality of service they provide. Always make sure you find someone with a reference you trust. Having quality childcare can mentally ease you up and allow you to focus on other aspects of your life.
- Make Mornings Easier - A hectic morning can certainly send your mood and day into a frenzy. So as much as possible, use the evening before to prepare so you’re not rushing when the sun rises. Whether it’s packing lunches, ironing your outfit, or organizing your home, finish it off before you head to bed. This way your mornings can start slower - with a coffee, some breakfast - and you can head out calm.
- Communicate With Your Employer - Are there flexible arrangements you could be making use of? Perhaps a work from home policy or the opportunity to leave early on specific days? Go into the meeting prepared to efficiently communicate your needs and also come with proposed solutions - list out stuff that works for you and is also beneficial to your employer.
- Limit Distractions And Time Wasters - Social media, TV, endless online scrolling. Save up your evenings and morning for your kids and your partner. And when you do spend time with your family, give them your full attention; try not to multitask.